


Empty promises

by tomlinfford



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Sad Louis, Sorry i didn't include the boys, There's a lot of thinking, and feelings, i like tags, louis centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-30
Updated: 2013-06-30
Packaged: 2017-12-16 14:55:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/863296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tomlinfford/pseuds/tomlinfford
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“He’ll come back to you soon, he always does.” Would whisper Zayn each time, so low that he’s the only one who can hear and Louis just wants to scream how wrong he is. He fakes a smile instead, taking the key for his –their- room and making his way to the elevator with the Bradford boy following close.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Empty promises

**Author's Note:**

> Basically, Louis feels sad. Inspired in recent events.

_“What if I lose you?” “Don’t worry about that, I won’t go anywhere.”_

Empty promises are like that, words that sound so genuine but when time comes they fly away into the wind leaving a broken heart behind and taking the last bit of trust with them. People believes them even when there’s a little voice in the back of their minds screaming –pleading- to not fall for those lies because once it’s all over the pain burns like a fire; the air is gone and you can’t breathe. There’s no safe heaven anymore, everything is crumbling all around you and no one can stop it because those lies were the beams holding up all the things that seemed so good yet so wrong.

Empty promises are like daggers, they cut deeper than the blade against someone’s wrist leaving scars that might never fade. Louis was familiar to the burning, breathless and painful feeling of his world crashing all around him when the beams were knocked down.

_“One day, I’ll marry you.” “Really?” “No doubt in my mind.”_

He saw the signs flashing with bright neon lights but he was blinded because Harry was brighter than any warning. What a fool. He ignored the voice in the back of his mind that tried to save him from falling because Harry’s promises were louder. How naïve. Words meant nothing anymore yet he accepted whatever Harry had to give, maybe something that would help him breathe properly again although nothing could save him now. Harry made empty promises and everything was crumbling starting with their relationship.

\------

Louis was lost in his thoughts when they pulled in front of their hotel for the night, reacting only when a warm hand rubbed at his back in a comforting manner making him tear his eyes away from his lap to look up at the face of his dark haired best friend; the hazel eyes spoke louder than any unsaid word and he sighed in defeat.

It had become a routine; Harry would get out of the tour bus before any of the boys could even register what was happening, he would take a single room, leaving Louis on his own or maybe just sharing with Zayn, he would pull lame excuses or –most likely- avoid Louis and then he would smile –that tiny sickly one dimpled smile- and say goodnight to everyone. He wouldn’t kiss Louis. He wouldn’t look at him. He would just turn around and walk away taking small pieces of Louis’ heart with him.

“He’ll come back to you soon, he always does.” Would whisper Zayn each time, so low that he’s the only one who can hear and Louis just wants to scream how wrong he is. He fakes a smile instead, taking the key for his –their- room and making his way to the elevator with the Bradford boy following close.

He fell asleep that night to the thought of green eyes and big hands caressing his back as he whispers a barely audible ‘I love you’ into his pillow, praying that maybe the curly haired boy can hear him despite the walls separating them from being with each other. He’s woken up by someone stroking his hair the next morning and he wishes that maybe Harry decided to say good morning, however, he’s met with soft hazel eyes instead of green ones when he finally opens his own to look up at his company and there’s no way to ignore the gloomy feeling, setting itself in the pit of his stomach

“I’m going out with Liam, wanna come?” Zayn’s hopeful tone makes him want to cry because his best friend is trying, he’s trying really hard to help Louis feel better, it doesn’t work. Nothing seems to work anymore and he wonders how he ended up like that while the forgotten voice in the back of his mind laughs mockingly since the answer is in the most beautiful of his memories, he knows how it happened. “No, it’s fine, have fun. I think I need a bit more of beauty sleep, don’t you think?” He jokes, stretching his muscles and pushing himself up into a sitting position to press a kiss to Zayn’s cheek before standing up and walking to the bathroom.

“Fine, fine, call me if you need me yeah? Love you.” It’s all the dark haired boy says before he’s out of the room leaving Louis on his own but hey, he’s not complaining, that happens a lot lately and he’s getting use to it.

He stands in front of the mirror for a while just watching his reflection, noticing the sadness in his eyes and no, that’s not right. He used to be happy and cheery all the time before Harry decided he was no longer fun to be with and… there it was. It was Harry’s fault, wasn’t it?

 _“Don’t be stupid, Tomlinson, it’s your entire goddamn fault.”_ Says the forgotten voice, and the burning feeling is there again, running through his veins.

He sinks to the floor then, eyelids tightly shut as a few tears ran down his cheeks and in that moment he allowed himself to be vulnerable. He thought back to the time when strong arms would be wrapped around his small frame and soft kisses would be pressed into his hair as he listened to the sweet lie that everything was going to be ok. He wishes for those arms to be there but it was in vain.

The clock is ticking and Louis can’t even count the minutes; the time he spends in the bathroom floor crying feels like an eternity but it’s still not enough since the burn is still vivid. There’s no way to stop it, is there? Broken and defeated the blue eyed boy finally stands up rubbing his face a bit too roughly with the palm of his hands as he steps into the shower.

The water is cold but it’s not enough to stop the burning feeling, running through his system so he tries with the hot water and it burns his skin but it helps a bit more; it takes his mind off the ache in his chest. It’s what he needs so Louis stays there for a little longer than he normally would, eyes closed as he tries to hold back the tears for his own sake. If he were going to start crying again there would be no way to stop, that’s the last thing he wants, to breakdown.

Some people may say it’s ok to let it all out, crying helps to ease the pain but in his case it only makes him feel powerless, helpless and empty. He just wants to push the thoughts away and forget all his worries, yet he can’t. It’s not possible anymore because Harry is the only person that can calm the storm of emotions but he’s somewhere out of reach.

Their relationship was falling apart and what was left of their friendship was fading away leaving Louis lost in darkness, gasping for air because Harry is the oxygen and he’s walking out of his life. He sobs into his hand for a few minutes before stepping out of the shower, reaching for a towel and very slowly drying himself, trying hard to not look up at his reflection in the mirror, he knows exactly what he would see and really, he’s never been more pathetic in his life.

There’s a knock on the door and he jumps at the faint sound; wrapping the towel around his waist and rubbing at his face once more he walks out of the bathroom and to the door of the suite, running his fingers through his damp hair to make it look a bit more decent before pulling the door open to find green eyes looking directly into his. He’s perplex for a moment taking in the image in front of him, there’s he is Harry, all awkward limbs and soft features, biting at his lip nervously –it’s an old habit- while he stares at Louis expectant for a moment and _wow, breathe_ whispers the voice in his mind.

He steps aside without a single word allowing Harry to come inside and his movements are very stiff as he takes a few steps into the room, Louis watches, still trying to figure out what to say or what to do. He closes the door very slowly and he’s still giving his back to Harry when the younger boy speaks “I want to break up.” It’s a small whisper but it sounds very loud in the silence of the room. Louis feels his heart sinking and he closes his eyes, praying to God –if there’s one- he won’t break down right there.

“Louis…” He doesn’t move. He just can’t. His body is not functioning properly anymore and the last breath he had is gone, he vaguely wonders how it’s possible to still be conscious when he feels so breathless. “Please don’t hate me. This is as hard for me as it is for you; you know how much you mean to me. You’re my best friend for God’s sake but… I can’t do it anymore. I can’t keep hiding! It’s not what I want and maybe… maybe you’re not what I need.” It’s like a punch and Louis feels knocked down but he’s still on his feet so he finally turns around, eyes wide open to stare at Harry and he can’t find any regret in those green eyes. He can’t read them as well as he thought he could because he doesn’t know Harry anymore.

There’s no pain in his voice, only pity and fuck it, that’s not what Louis wants. He wants Harry to be hurt because that’s what you feel when you lose the person you love. Louis stares at him for a few minutes just listening to his own heartbeat and Harry is not moving, just looking down at the floor. “Get out.” That’s all he says and it’s surprises him because he didn’t know where it came from. Harry looks up then, there’s a hint of hurt in his eyes but it’s gone so fast that Louis wonders if he imagined it.

“Louis, please, don’t throw me out.” There’s desperation in his voice and he reaches forwards to take hold of Louis hand but takes a step back, Harry takes the hint and stops, looking at the boy he used to call his boyfriend completely dejected. “You can’t possibly be asking me that.” It comes out harsh, Louis realizes but he can’t stop his mouth from spilling the things he was never meant to say out loud.

“You can’t possibly think that I won’t be fucking angry! You want to break up with me then fine, that’s perfectly fine” He’s yelling and Harry flinches “But you can’t just expect me to be ok with that lame excuse you’re throwing. You’ve been avoiding me for days, weeks even, and I missed you. I missed you so badly but you didn’t care and now, now I realize why you didn’t care so don’t fucking tell me it hurts you, don’t tell me it’s hard for you because you’re not regretting this, you don’t regret the pain you’re putting me through and that’s why I want you to leave, I don’t want you here. I don’t want to look at you and know what I’m losing, I don’t want to see you because it makes me feel like an idiot for believe those stupid promises you made.” He’s crying as he yells at Harry and the younger boy has the decency to at least look a bit guilty but it’s not enough to make him feel better, it only makes him angrier “You never planned in marrying me, you never planned in staying”

He watches Harry’s fists, clenching and unclenching and the silence that crash over them; Louis wants to pull at his hair and scream, he wants to break something and most definitely he wants to punch the first thing on his way so he can’t relieve the anger taking over himself but then Harry’s moving towards him; grabbing him the wrist them pinning him against the door, he looks at him, surprised and there are tears in his eyes threatening to spill. There’s an invisible force around them and everything has suddenly become too much to handle.

“I did, I fucking did” Harry hisses, he’s angry but most of all, he’s hurt. “I wanted to marry you so badly, you have no idea, I still want to! Don’t you dare saying I never did because all I could think about was a future together. I could only pray that one day we would find a way to come out and be happy, to finally tell the world you were mine but I can’t take this anymore, Louis! I can’t take the pain of not touching you. God, I can’t even look at you in public anymore and it hurts, I need to get out of this relationship before it kills me.”

There’s silence again and they just stare at each other, both of them are freely crying now and none of them knows how it happened but they are kissing. Louis fingers are tangled in Harry’s messy hair as the younger boy takes hold of the back of his thighs, pulling him off his feet and dropping the towel on the floor. The kiss is desperate and messy, there’s a hunger need between them that has to be satisfied so their argument can wait because they need each other to ease the thunderstorm that wanted so badly to blow up.

They made love to each other; it was slow, all soft kisses and tender fingers and once it was done, they stayed in bed for a while, legs intertwined as they whispered sweet promises of “everything is gonna be ok” into each other’s skin before falling asleep together for the first time in weeks.

When Louis woke up later that day, around three p.m. Harry was still beside him and in that moment he realized the burning was no longer there and he could breathe again; it might not be healthy how dependent of him he had become but he didn’t care because Harry was there, was still his and maybe, they were going to be ok.

Maybe, Harry’s promises weren’t so empty after all.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry, I'm shit at this and it's been a while since the last time I wrote. Shit ending, I know. Oops. I'm sorry if you wasted your time reading. I love you.


End file.
